Celebrated my 48th birthday the other day. Now, typically I just let the day come and go...thanking God for another year, thanking others for gifts and kind words...so on and so forth. However, this year I realized that I am rapidly approaching a milestone year...50. Yeah, I know that it's two years away and ANYTHING can happen within a two year period, but still....50. I am excited to even be saying that I am coming up to...50. If you really knew my background then you would really understand why 50 is an huge number for me. So, as I contemplated 50 I did something that I have not done in a very long time. I took stock. I sat back and thought about where I am, where God has me and where I desire to be.
At 48 I know that I don't have all of the material things that are often associated with being middle aged by the world...don't have a big fancy house, nice new shiny car, membership to an elite country club, 6 figure job and a big company/corporation...nope, I don't have any of those things. In fact some of my peers would say that I'm living well under what I should be...according to them. But, that's ok because I don't have the other things that come with the great material things. Like: a huge mortgage, car payments, stress from trying to keep up with the "Joneses", work related paranoia, a family that is crumbling because I'm too busy with work to be a husband and a dad...nah, I don't have the 48 year old "stuff"...Thank God. What I do have is a wife that loves me in spite of the dope that I usually am. What I do have are sons and grandchildren that love me and since the sons have grown older they realize that their dad has some brains in his head...they actually seek out my advice now...so all in all, I think it's a fantastic trade off...
But seriously...when I think about it, my life thus far has been a whirlwind of God events. God has placed me exactly where He wants me. Even when I was an enemy of the cross, God loved me and thought enough of me to protect me from the world and more often from myself...in order for me to get to year 48. And now...well, now I am taking stock....
God has me at a crossroads of sorts....I see the vision but am not sure how step into it. It's like being in a room with a bunch of chairs...I have to sit in one of the chairs and they are all good seats...in fact, there is no bad seat...but, there is only one right seat.
So here I am...48 and soaring...no regrets...well, maybe a few...and right where God wants me...seeking and searching for His face and His will in my life...looking to sit in the right seat...the God seat...it's a maddening time...sometimes frustrating, sometimes exhilarating, but so far it's been a great ride. I have made some mistakes...TONS of 'em...but God still has brought me to this place in time. Which seat? Which seat? What a predicament...and you know what? I wouldn't change a thing...
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